Monday, February 16, 2009

This is the beginning of my new life

So by starting this blog, I am going to tell you about myself and how I got myself into this predicament. Yeah, I said how I got myself into this predicament. No one shoveled food and candy into my mouth, I did it all by myself. And now I am getting myself set to get myself out of it and having learned my lesson I am hoping that this blog helps others too. This is a journey of my life from fat to fabulous starting today Febuary 16th, which happens to be my 29th birthday.

I was born in a small town in Ohio on a cold day on Febuary 16th, 1980 to Bill and Susan Clime. I have an older sister, Jenny, who I always looked up to much to her demise. I was a normal healthy child. Back to my oldest memories I remember always running everywhere. I loved to run. I would run back and forth from the barn to the house (did I mention I grew up on a farm). I am so looking forward to running again. Now, I get short of breath just thinking of running. I spent a lot of time with with babysitters as both my parents held full time jobs. The Kirby's molded me into what I am today. My morals and values come from them as they were not just my babysitters, they were my Sunday school teachers and more or less "grandparents". I remember on my first day of kindergarten my mom and dad put me on that big yellow school bus and being so nervous until the school day ended. I had a note from my mom that on most days I was to be dropped off at Kirby's house. However, my teacher must have thought everyday I was to be dropped off at Kirbys because on that special day when my parents were waiting at the end of our driveway waiting to hear about my first big day, I was making the long walk up the seemingly endless driveway up to Kirb's house. No one was expecting me at Kirbs house. Boy were my parents worried and a little upset that they didn't get to see me get off the school bus for the first time. I was always a very active child, I would rather be outside than in. On rainy days I would go stir crazy. I didn't start to gain weight until I was in at least 2nd or 3rd grade. The big turning point in my life was when my parents seperated. My sister then turned into my babysitter and I did what she did. We would get out of school, go back to our apartment and sit infront of the television and watch MTV. From years on then I would continue to gain weight until I was in high school when I went on a liquid diet and lost around 100 lbs. It was near the end of my junior year that I started the liquid diet and it went all the way through until I started college. I remember on my first day back to school my senior year I was walking down the hallway and a girl that I had went through all my school years with introduced herself to me and I looked at her and said, "Amanda, it's me Katey." She could hardly believe herself. I had the best year of all my school years that senior year. I was more confident in myself and I joined more activites and made more friends and was not afraid to be myself. When I started college that following September 2008 at Bowling Green State University I was not fat but not skinny. I thought of myself as a normal college kid. I was so excited and I meet so many new people. I started to realize that funny saying about the "college 15" meant for me the "college 50" . I was so dissapointed in myself. One weekend when I came home to visit my parents I went up town and went "lapping" with friends. I meet a guy. ( I will make this short and simple). I ended up leaving Bowling Green moving back in with my parents and trying to make a family with him and his daughter. Yeah, as you guessed it...it didn't work in the biggest way. It was a very emotional abusive relationship. I didn't have any self worth, no self confidence and I was so nervous to be by myself in my house and I couldnt even take a shower in the house with out someone else being in the house with me. Still to this day I can't stand silence. I have to have some noise in the background. I wasted 3 years of my life with him and I will not spend another minute more on him. When I finally left him I then started to pick up the pieces of my life. I moved back in with my parents again and started to get better grades in school. I changed my major to Social Work from Education and I had big dreams of helping other women like me get out of bad relationships. I soon moved to Columbus to the main campus of Ohio State University. While I lived in Columbus all my hard work of gaining confidence and self esteem went right down the toilet. I became a recluse in my little one room apartment. I rarely went to class and lived for the weekend when I went home. I started to realize with myself that I needed to move back with my parents and change colleges to Marion Technical College. When I started at Marion Technical College I started a new life. I started getting straight "A's" and really caring about my grades and was making new friends that I had things in common with. When I finally graduated in May 2005 I had a grade point average of 3.9 I was a straight A student and had completed 3 studies of where I worked in the field. I was loving life. I was also in love with the man of my dreams. I met him online in March and was so nervous about meeting him in person and not liking me for who I am. His name is Kristian and boy was I smitten. His profile picture was him holding an ice cream cone. In his profile he told me that he was a manager of a Dairy Queen and I thought to myself, "perfect...free ice cream for life!" I was heavy by then and weighed around (gulp) 350 lbs. He and I talked on the phone for about a month before I agreed to meet him. On April 2nd he drove from Cleveland to Mansfield to pick me up and he drove me back to Cleveland and took me to which is now my favorite resturant, Pickwick and Frolic, and then took me to Hilarites the comedy club. I had the best "first date" ever. Well it just so happened that we had a freak snow storm that day and we got more than 7 inches of snow and he drove me back to Mansfield and then drove back home. What I realized when I was driving home from the date was that I was shocked that I felt so comfortable with him. I actually fell asleep on the way home. I had never done that before! I was always on the lookout for potential disasters and accidents and always preferred to drive to feel more in control. I remember telling my mom when I got home that he was going to be someone very special in my life. Boy, what I didn't know! He eventually came to be my best friend, my soul mate, and my husband. I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would trust someone and love someone so completely. I am so comfortable with him that I don't mind taking my clothes off infront of him and don't mind letting him having control and letting him decide. I now have someone that I can laugh with and share my dreams with. We got married on a breezy beautiful day, August 26th, 2006. It was the best day of my life. Since that day I have put on more weight and I am now at the heaviest I have been in my entire life. I am so dissapointed in myself for letting me get this way or should I say weigh...I have tried many years to have the bariatric surgery and I am finally getting my dream. I am so ready and pumped for the long journey ahead. So I am starting this blog for family members and friends to stay in touch and see how I am doing on this journey. I am also doing this blog for new friends to learn and see how losing weight will change your looks but your beauty on the inside. So welcome to my journey from fat to fabulous!

1 comment:

Adan said...

Katey! I didn't know you started this blog? Where was the Facebook status message. Anyway, I will continue to read and comment. I commend you on your journey and hope it leads you to the places you want to go!